A message from the Canadian Association of Retired Persons (CARP):
While a lot of focus is rightly being placed on the safety of students, less discussed are the very real implications on the rest of the family “bubble” (core group of people who maintain physical distance from others and can safely be close to each other during the pandemic). Grandparents, who often serve as the linch pin of the family’s day to day operations, will be facing tough decisions on how to remain safely connected to their grandchildren as a potential second wave of COVID-19 hits this fall.
“Many of our Members tell us they feel like we’re back in the early days of the pandemic, when so much anxiety was caused by the unknown,” says Bill VanGorder, CARP’s Interim Chief Policy Officer. “Social isolation is wreaking havoc on seniors across the country. We’re seeing increased rates of depression, cognitive decline and injury in vulnerable elders who have been cut off from their families due to physical distancing measures. Staying connected to grandchildren is key in keeping older people active, engaged and mentally healthy.”
Given that grandparents often care for children while their parents go to work, maintaining physical distance will be next to impossible for many families. This poses a serious safety concern, as school-aged children are up to 4 times more likely to spread the virus to others—a risk older people need to avoid at all costs.
With concerns mounting that schools will be a hotbed for outbreaks, many parents are opting to keep their kids at home or arrange to work from home themselves in order to protect their older loved ones from exposure to COVID-19. On top of this, approximately 400,000 homes in Canada are intergenerational, meaning grandparents are intimately ingrained in the household alongside their younger family members.
“Parents are being reminded how integral grandparents are to keeping their lives running smoothly,” notes VanGorder. “Many parents are going so far as to split up their family bubble into 2. One parent will bubble with the grandparents and the other with the kids. Urgency breeds creativity, and they want to make sure their family elders are as safe as possible going into the school year.”
Luckily for grandparents looking to stay connected to their grandkids, even when maintaining physical distance, there are many options. While nothing can replace a real life hug, we’ve put together a list of ways to be a great “physically-distanced grandparent”, submitted by our members:
- Learn to use Facetime or Skype on your phone or computer so you can watch a show or movie on one while video chatting on the other simultaneously.
- Set up specific times to visit online so your grandchildren have those to look forward to—kids like and need structure in these “covid-irregular” times.
- Do simple fitness activities like chair yoga, stretches, walking on the spot etc. together, electronically.
- Schedule shows, movies and other programs you will watch together and chat about, e.g. start watching a TV show or movie at the same time and chat on another device while watching, or after, so it’s a shared experience. If you only have phone access, watch the movie or TV ahead of time and then discuss.
- Help your grandchildren write fun letters and take photos to send to other relatives.
- Read a book to them over the phone or online.
- Ask them to make collections (such as similar toys, or old photos or other household handy items) as a sort of a Treasure Hunt.
- Download books for a virtual age-appropriate book club discussion.
- Listen to music with them and have them explain their music preferences to you.
- If they are older, ask them to do errands like shopping for you (if they are nearby). Make them feel wanted and useful.
- Show an interest and help with their school work.
- Ask about and discuss their world of sports, e.g. what they are missing and how they think their favourite sports will rebound when the pandemic is under control.
- Send your grandchildren a parcel every other week. You could include a craft to be done together with a parent, some ‘homework ‘ fun pages, homemade cookies, etc. Never send them the same day; keep them wondering when it will arrive and don’t tell when or what is in it.
- Share recipes by texting pictures back and forth of what you have created. Make it a fun contest on baking/cooking a variety of different things.
- Write down a favourite made-up story and share it as you would a book. Works for both kids and grandparents who have been in the habit of making up stories.
- Watch the online kitchen parties that are full of singing and dancing together and showing support for front-line workers and support staff. Watch them together by telephone or online.
Do you have another suggestion that has worked for you? Help CARP build out the list! Email your ideas to advocacy@CARP.ca.
